Naira Notes Establish Exclusive Club: VIP Access Granted to “POS Operators.”

ATMs Adopt a Strict Diet: Now Dispense Currency Only on Cheat Days.

Once upon a time, or more accurately, in the not-so-distant fourth quarter of 2023, Nigeria underwent a radical redesign of the nation’s beloved naira. Little did the citizens know, they were about to become unwilling participants in what can only be described as the greatest currency heist in history. What began as a routine monetary facelift soon morphed into financial skullduggery akin to Italian mafia operations. Banks, playing the role of mischievous treasure keepers, decided to keep fresh cash under wraps. Guarding the fresh currency with the secrecy of a Masonic initiation.

Enter the unexpected heroes of this unfolding drama – the Local Point Of Sale (POS) operators. Top bank bosses, with a sudden stroke of genius, decided to outsource their currency distribution operation to these unsung financial acrobats. POS operators, often seen as inconspicuous players in the financial ecosystem, were suddenly thrust into the limelight.

The result? Nigerians now acquire their own currency through intermediaries, resulting in the siphoning of significant portions of the nation’s cash reserves! (I shouldn’t have ended that sentence with an exclamation mark, because are you even surprised?)

But hold on, it gets better – or worse, depending on where you stand (or sit on your newfound pile of Naira). Post-redesign, bank ATMs appear to be the new national joke, as most of the cash has mysteriously vanished into the hands of these POS operators. It seems the ATMs have decided to join the ‘cash-lite’ movement, opting for a leaner, meaner existence. ATMs, once reliable dispensers of cash, now reportedly suffer from an acute shortage as the majority of available funds are redirected towards the POS operators.

Amid the unfolding monetary heist, the Central Bank of Nigeria entrusted with overseeing the nation’s monetary policies and the Nigerian Labour Congress representing the interests of the labor force, assumed the roles of silent spectators. Not like we expect a lot from these institutions meant to work in the interest of the Nigerian public. Over time, they’ve proven to be as useful as the letter S in the word ‘aisle’. No regulatory oversight and they are without a doubt complicit in the carrying out of these opaque practices.

This points to a nuanced interplay between traditional financial systems and an emerging underground economy, which I will colloquially refer to as the “Naira Nostra.” Drawing parallels to the clandestine world of organized crime, this term encapsulates the hidden forces at play within the financial sector. Local POS operators, once facilitating legitimate transactions, now unwittingly find themselves part of a shadowy distribution network, echoing the dynamics of the Italian mafia.

What is perhaps equally intriguing is the absence of a significant public outcry. Despite the disruption to traditional financial practices, citizens seem to have adapted to the new normal with a mix of resignation and pragmatism. The lack of mass protests or vocal opposition raises questions about the resilience of the Nigerian populace in the face of economic upheaval. (Again, are you really surprised at this? I know I’m not.)

The redesigned naira, with all its complexities and revelations, has laid bare the challenges inherent in the nation’s economic structure. It is the collective responsibility of citizens to demand accountability (since regulatory bodies have gone to sleep). The shadows cast by the ‘Naira Nostra,’ and the reshaping of ATMs into mere bank hall designs demand introspection and action. The redesigned naira, which set out to redefine the face of Nigerian currency, has inadvertently redefined the expectations citizens hold for their financial institutions.

It is through informed discourse, collective action, and a commitment to traditional financial values that Nigeria can navigate this period of siege by the ‘Naira Nostra’ and emerge with a strengthened economic foundation. (This last paragraph is me being optimistic, which is a very dangerous emotion to wield as a Nigerian because nothing ever changes).

P.S – I got inspired to write this article because I was charged 500 naira to withdraw 15,000 naira of my own freaking money! No where else in the world are citizens buying their own currency ffs.

As a people, we’re not angry enough!

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